Busy!

It has been AGES since I last posted. In that time I've lost a friendship, I've had a daughter and son-in-law move back into town from North Carolina, we've driven our son to Nashville for his 7 week mission trip to El Salvador, we've purchased a small 5 acre farm and moved, and we've had a 1 week visit with our returned son before driving him back out to Nashville for college.

In that time I've often remembered to be real and to be courageous. Have I succeeded? Not always. Not even mostly. But definitely more than I used to. The same people still walk all over me and I keep quiet but mostly because I'm not finding a way to kindly keep it from happening. I still have a lot to learn.

One thing I'm learning in my quest to be God's failure is I'm finally finding out who I am! I spent a lifetime being what others wanted me to be - so long, in fact, that I lost "me" in the process. Even with family I was usually trying to be what I thought they wanted me to be. I did it so long that even I didn't know who I really was. When I went somewhere on my own, I couldn't make simple decisions because I wasn't able. And there was no one else to try and please.

So now I'm attempting! It's a start, right?